Between That Guy and I, one of us was raised an only child and the other not. That means one of us has never really understood the differences between the first and second time around having a baby and the other experienced it first hand. I think our situation for the last year has only really exacerbated the differences. I wouldn’t say That Baby was neglected by any means, it’s just that obviously our attention was divided by two kids to start with at this point and then there were times attention was divided between two kids and cancer.
Wacky Wednesday – Peonies and Flower Picking
June 3, 2015 Leave a Comment
I absolutely love planting flowers each spring. The weeding and mulching, I could do without, but one of those two That Guy is willing to help with so it all works out in the end. My favorite time of year is when my peonies bloom. I planted the bushes the year we were married since they were part of my wedding bouquet. As we are married longer, the bushes mature and each year there are more and more blooms. I will be sad to leave them behind when we do move eventually, but I kind of have hopes that I can take them with us somehow and then add to them in a new home.
Not this year, but in the past, I have talked up the peony blooms to That Little Girl. It got to the point that she was asking when the “panties” were going to pop open. It took a little bit, but she eventually started calling them peonies.
She is the best little helper when I am out planting flowers. The first time I was out this year, she was raking up the leaves and junk that I was pulling out of the flower beds. She would make me piles of what I threw on the patio and sidewalk to make it easier to clean up. Of course, she then asked to be rewarded with her very own first frappuccino! She loved her strawberry (no caffeine) treat and I was thankful they have a teeny tiny size for summer. Luckily she understands it is a very once in a while/lifetime treat. She worked her little tushie off that day! And since I still tire easily, I will take all the help I can get. And then I will rest after doing next to nothing compared to what I could accomplish in the past. So this spring all the work has taken a lot longer than usual and I am still not done.
Another day, she was not feeling well and I was out planting flowers on my own most of the time. I find planting the actual flowers goes really quickly once all the crap work is done. So wish it were the other way around! The actual planting is the fun part! Anyway, a few days later That Guy was outside with That Little Girl in the evening and I was out with a friend. He turned his back and That Little Girl decided to pick some flowers. But instead of picking flowers that are to be picked she pulled up entire plants. Then when I got home she scolded me for not digging deep enough holes without her help. The next time I went out she insisted on digging the holes for me. Since we aren’t suppose to call little girls bossy, I will just point out that she has amazing leadership skills!
Now we are entering the weeks of peony and rose blooms. I am terrified to turn my back and find them all picked bare and hacked to pieces!
Lesson Learned… Again
May 29, 2015 Leave a Comment
My long term treatment plan has been up in the air. There are constantly new studies released and every nuance makes a difference for what determines each person’s set plan. Literally for the last five months the plan that they said was the absolute best a year ago, was now up in the air and open for interpretation and discussion, oh so much discussion!
Wacky Wednesday – Windy Wednesday
May 27, 2015 Leave a Comment
Breast Cancer isn’t really very funny. Parenthood, however, I will admit can be really really funny. And I do try to laugh at myself as often as possible. When you combine That Girl, That Guy, and My Girls, you get a pretty Wacky life. When I was a child, probably when I was learning to read, one of my favorite books was “Wacky Wednesday” by Dr. Seuss. Since we constantly talk about how wacky my oldest is, some Wednesdays I will be sharing what I think are pretty Wacky stories, quotes, and silliness from our lives. Enjoy!
A few weeks ago, my girls and I were waiting for my mom to come up so we could go run a few errands. She was a little later getting to our house since she had to detour, because a car had run into a small store near their home. Luckily, from what she has heard, no one was hurt. Off we went to run errands in my car with my brand new tire. I had recently had a tire blow out spontaneously with both my girls in the car. Luckily we were not too far from a dealership, and I was able to get in there and super luckily they had a rental available and helped me out immediately! So you could say there were random car mishaps happening around us and they always say these types of things happen in threes. We should have been expecting it. Especially on a gray drizzly windy day!
One Year
May 22, 2015 Leave a Comment
One really fast yet never ending all at once horrible yet uplifting while surrounded my love and support and definitely insightful year where I learned a lot about myself. One year ago, I was told it would be one really horrible year, but I would get through it. It was horrible, and it was so many other things at the same time. She was right. I got through it. We lost one before he even knew it had started and gained one right behind that when she was born into the crazy only to be the most peaceful of us all. One really crazy year. My thoughts approaching this day are a jumbled overwhelming combination of gratitude, sadness, disbelief, anger, love, frustration, pride and so many things I am working to identify. I don’t even know what to call the day. I have heard cancer-versary, life day, and just THE day. I’ve just been calling it the one year since official diagnosis day since they really told me at the ultrasound/biopsy anyway two days prior.
At some point I will share how we mark this milestone. There is not going to be a party as was suggested at the start of all this. Seems weird to throw a party to celebrate myself, ha! Keeping my girls and the rest of my family close to my side and doing a few of my favorite things. Hopefully they hug me a lot and my girls give me lots of snuggles.
Do Your Job
May 19, 2015 Leave a Comment
As anyone who has dealt with their own or a loved ones medical emergency can attest to, sometimes you feel like your job is to make sure other people do their job. There were days I seriously just wanted to scream DO YOUR JOB so I didn’t have to. I have said that I was provided a nurse navigator through my health network system. There were times I could not imagine navigating this process without her. Once the process kept going, she was sort of a last resort to get done what I needed to when I was not able to get things moving. If you don’t have a navigator, as most people do not even though they are becoming more prominent in this sort of setting, it all falls on you and can be even more frustrating. This is where having a notebook, a planner, and a support system buddy at your appointments can really be helpful. You will need to be your own advocate and push people to get done what you need to in whatever time frame is necessary in your situation.
Wacky Wednesday – Inside Jokers
May 13, 2015 Leave a Comment
Breast Cancer isn’t really very funny. Parenthood, however, I will admit can be really really funny. And I do try to laugh at myself as often as possible. When you combine That Girl, That Guy, and My Girls, you get a pretty Wacky life. When I was a child, probably when I was learning to read, one of my favorite books was “Wacky Wednesday” by Dr. Seuss. Since we constantly talk about how wacky my oldest is, some Wednesdays I will be sharing what I think are pretty Wacky stories, quotes, and silliness from our lives. Enjoy!
Now that things are going better and I am more physically able, That Little Girl and I spend some time together just us. We try to do a couple hours each weekend, but we don’t always have it. We just do our best to line it up with That Baby’s nap so that That Guy can be doing something here at the house as well. Needless to say, it takes some coordination to make sure we hti all those goals. I am happy to say it has been really good for our relationship getting back to “the old days” as she likes to call it.
Slightly Less Than Smooth Sailing
May 7, 2015 3 Comments
About half way through the Taxol, Perjeta, and Herceptin routine, things started to go slightly less than smoothly. I had some issues with my stomach, a rash, and I was getting more tired each time. Unlike the first set of drugs, these were hitting me each and every week with no time to bounce back. Good for getting the job done I suppose, but not so good for rest and relaxation. And to top it off, we were heading into the holidays. Overall, though, not too bad compared to what I hear from other patients’ experiences.
Say Anything
April 30, 2015 Leave a Comment
So, I’ve been trying to figure out how to write a post about what to say to or how to support someone who is going through cancer, or any medical crisis really. Every time I try to write it, it comes off as really mean and ungrateful. That Guy is blunt about this. There really isn’t a nice way to give specific examples of things said or people who have disappointed me without potentially hurting someone’s feelings or sounding like one of those annoying vague Facebook posts. That is not my intention.
All About My Girls 